You're not reading this, obviously. Obviously, because you are not supposed to know about this. So I guess it's safe that I'm writing this here. Not that I mind if you read it. Maybe it's better if you read it. Or perhaps not. Perhaps it doesn't make a difference. Because maybe you don't care. But whatever.

Here are the things I miss about you:
1) having your belly button cleaned
2) whining & complaining (hotel staff, traffic, customs, airlines)
3) the occasional e-mail that makes me smile
4) being there so I can make up strange nicknames for you
5) planning beautiful holidays
6) more whining & complaining while we're on holiday
7) going to bed at 10
8) washing my hair
9) pretending to know everything
10) drinking with me

That last point because I'm drinking by myself at this moment. It kind of sucks. But it's kind of nice. It's making me write this. I guess it doesn't hurt to be honest and vulnerable from time to time. Really. What's the point of being so strong and independent all the time? But I guess I have to be those things right now. Because you're not here. Are you coming back? If so, when? If not, then I guess it's a good thing I'm writing these things down so I don't forget.

Well, do try to come back. If you can.